The History of "The Whitepology"

By The Webmaster.

A Whitepology is an act in which a Caucasian excessively apologizes regardless of whether or not they are actually at fault. Although this phenomenon is most commonly observed in Caucasian women, on the whole it has been widely accepted as a classic, cross gender, Caucasian behavioral condition.

Recent studies have come to light showing the origins of this behavioral pattern through history. Prior to the abolishment of slavery, most Caucasians did not apologize for anything and “borrowed” natural resources and people across the globe as they saw fit. As a result, the aggregate Whitepologies per minute records were low to non existent.

After the abolishment of slavery in 1866 following “The Civil War,” Whitepologies saw a sharp spike rivaled only by the spread of the HIV virus and Girls Gone Wild videos. This was a protective mechanism to calm down a lot of angry black people with only “40 acres and mule” as payment for centuries of promotion-worthy endeavor. In recent times, the Whitepology has survived as a means of being overly accommodating to black people in order to relieve their social anxiety.
On November 5, 2008, Barack Obama was elected president of the United States. Being an African American, this sent waves of panic in Caucasian circles. Caucasians feared: job loss, persecution, discrimination and the disappearance of Turkey Sandwiches all together. As a result, a slight but significant increase in Whitepologies has been observed in 2009. Post Obama racial conditions are projected to cause Whitepologies to increase and graphically approach infinity by the year 3123.

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