Africanlegend interviews Al-Qaeda operative.

By Africanlegend.

Africanlegend used the connections he made during his brief exile (read article) to catch up with Ali Baba, a former Al-Qaeda operative of the “40 thieves” unit. His major intention was to find out what makes this devastating terrorist group the force that it is. Al-Qaeda is an Islamic fundamentalist group founded in the late 1980's and has been widely credited for attacks on various civilian and military targets in several countries around the world, the most notable being the September 11 attacks in 2001.

AL's interview manuscript:

AL: For those people out there that do not know, what exactly is Al-Qaeda?

Ali Baba: Al-Qaeda is a professional terrorist group whose main goal is to promote an agenda of fear and breed chaos. As a result of our good work, people are now scared and they believe that every Muslim is carrying home made explosives and will blow them up, when in actual fact most Muslims are people of peace. One of Al-Qaeda’s main tactics involves making flying on airlines a pain in the butt for everyone. We thought it was funny to see people have deodorant and hygiene products confiscated at security check points. Post 911 plane rides were up to 67.46% smellier and more uncomfortable.

AL: The Question on every bodies mind is whether or not Osama Bin Laden is still alive. Can you give us some insight on that?

Ali Baba: Well I am not at liberty to disclose such information, not even to a world renowned, public figure such as you Mr. Africanlegend. I will say one thing though. I do not think someone with kidney issues who requires such a colossal kidney dialysis machine can get very far very quickly. In fact his particular model of machine is so big it is actually visible from space on Google maps if you zoomed in sufficiently.

AL: Al-Qaeda is credited with many acts of terror all over the world. To what extent are they actually involved?

Ali Baba: It Depends. In the beginning we did a lot of the work ourselves and we took credit for it accordingly. However AL-Qaeda is in the business of making our operations more efficient and effective. We realized suicide bombers were not only inefficient but were severely depleting our staff, so we came up with a solution. We hired somebody to sit on a computer and Google terror-related events that were happening in the world. Following that, we used our Apple MAC-books, with built in web camera, to make a video claiming credit for it. We had to eventually switch to PC because people could not open our videos unless they had a MAC or i-phone. Due to numerous complaints that we have received about the extremely poor quality of our videos, our IT technicians are currently working on “terrorcam.com/terrorvision” which will broadcast videos in High Definition.

AL: What do you think of the term “The War on Terror!”

Ali Baba: Like most things Georgie came up with, we found this statement particularly entertaining. We are still trying to figure out this “Terror” that the war is targeted against and where one would geographically find it. The most entertaining thing though was all the names Georgie came up with like “Axis of Evil” and “Operation Iraqi freedom”. The news sounded like a trailer to one of those awful Steven Seagal and Jean Claude Van Damme movies of the early 90's.

Exclusive Trailer:

Terror in our midst (explosion),
Terror running wild (baby screaming),
and only one man can stop the world from ultimate destruction.....

Samuel L Jackson stars as George Bush and Megan Fox as Hilary Clinton.....

Your mind will be blown away by......

“AXIS OF EVIL 2 – Revenge of the Sheikh”

AL: What is the latest act of Terror Al-Qaeda denounces, if any?

Ali Baba: Al Qaeda, as a group, were watching the last MTV video music awards online and it so happens that they saw some guy named Kanye West jump on the stage while another artist was receiving an award and interrupted her. By definition, that is an act of terror and while Al-Qaeda is happy to take credit for most of the terrorist activities around the world, this particular act was so terroristic that Al-Qaeda refuses to associate themselves with it in any way. I mean what kind of a Dbag does such a thing anyway???

Spread peace not hate :-)

Posted in: Politics