This is a Sponsored post written by me on behalf of Straight Talk for SocialSpark. All opinions are 100% mine.

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I dated a woman that used Metro PCS. We soon decided we'd call it Metro POS as in Metro "Piece of Sh@t" simply because I had a better chance of communicating with prehistoric communication methods. If had I chosen to send her snail mail and the postal service lost it and redirected it through 10 additional states and one other planet, she would have got it sooner than her Metro PCS phone found enough bars of service to receive a call. Even smoke signals were more effective as they can be seen from great distances. While the specificity of the message cannot be determined, as least you know somebody is trying to communicate with you, that a step above the service Metro PCS offers. To call a friend should not be this complicated..

Metro PCS sucks, and even the $40 or $50 you pay for the service can be put to much better use if you walked to the bathroom and flushed it directly down the toilet. If you do not have service in Las Vegas and Phoenix what is the point of having a phone that claims to be nationwide?

The reality is that, services like Metro PCS save people money and offer more flexibility in comparison to contract-based services but does one have to opt for such crappy service? Straight Talk is a newer service that provides and alternative for people that don't want to get contracts but also don't want a phone that chooses not to work exactly when you need it most.

Straight Talk offers everything you need:

  • No contracts, no surprise bills and no credit checks.
  • Great nationwide coverage and excellent reception/connectivity.
  • Trusted phone manufacturers like LG, Motorola, Kyocera, Nokia and Samsung with great affordable phone selection.
  • Free from activation, reactivation, or termination fees and 411 calls are included at no extra charge.
  • A flexible prepaid calling service that enables you to make international calls from your home, cell or office phone at low rates.

I Hope the idea that you can't have a good phone service unless you have a contract is not something you have fallen for hook, line and sinker because you really can save a lot of money by having non-contractual based phone service like Straight Talk. It work and you'll have extra money at the end of the month to spoil yourself. So stop paying an arm and a leg.

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Orlando Nembhard and twin brother in Arizona Murder Investigation
Which was it? Orlando Nembhard, left, has been released on bail amid speculation that his twin brother Brandon, right, may have actually committed the murder
Law enforcement seeing double vision: Orlando Nembhard has been in an Arizona since March 28 on murder charges, but is poised to be released on bail as investigators are uncertain as to whether the suspect in jail should be Orlando or his twin brother Brandon.  Authorities say witnesses have given conflicting statements about who pulled the trigger with some witnesses describing the defendant (by his clothing) as the shooter and others describing his twin brother as the shooter.

As result of their uncertainty. Orlando Nembhard's bond was lowered from $500,000 to $10,000 on Thursday after it was determined that there wasn't enough evidence to keep Orlando Nembhard in jail for the murder of 19-year-old Sir Xavier Brooks who was shot and killed outside an Arizona nightclub on Feb 12.

I guess we learn something new everyday. If you want to commit a heinous crime in the US and get away with it being an identical twin is a step in right direction. It would even be difficult to establish who did it had the murderer left his DNA at the scene of the crime as identical twins have near identical DNA. With no fingerprints in the evidence locker, which would definitively separate the two, the law seems to have it's hands tied. Is this the perfect crime or what???

Orlando Nembhard and twin brother in Arizona Murder Investigation
Dumb Teacher, Dumbest Teacher ever

It is refreshing to know our kids are in good hands and raised in an atmosphere where they are encouraged to ask questions and constructively question what they are taught at school.

Or maybe not???


Gus Pool
Gus the Bulldog!
A Bulldog named Gus shows us what you can achieved with a little bit of perseverance. To tell you the truth, I gave him no chance of succeeding his mission lol! ~ Worth watching till end!

South Koreans create Teagon, the Glow in the Dark Dog
Tegon, glowing in the dark.
Researchers at Seoul National University have announced the creation of a genetically modified, glow-in-the-dark dog using a cloning technique that could help find cures for human diseases such as Alzheimer's and Parkinson's. The researchers say that the ability to glow can be turned on or off by adding a drug named doxycycline to the dog's food.

The creation of Tegon, the glow in the dark beagle, opens new horizons since the gene injected to make Tegon glow can be substituted with genes that trigger fatal human diseases. Humans and Dogs share 268 known illnesses and creating dogs that artificially show such symptoms could aid treatment methods for diseases that afflict humans.

Led by Lee Byeong-chun, the researchers used the same somatic cell nuclear transfer technique to make Tegon glow that was used in 2005 to make the world’s first cloned dog, Snuppy. Tegon, took about 4 years of research at total cost in excess of 3 million dollars. 

Along with the potential to help cure deadly diseases, glow in the dark dog can also be:
1. Tied to bicycles and used in lieu of reflectors.
2. Used as bed side lamps.
3. Flash lights, in the event that there is no power.
4. High visibility scarecrows.
2. Used to scare naughty children that refuse to listen to their parents.
South Koreans create Teagon, the Glow in the Dark Dog
Tegon's paws visible seen to glow in the dark
SOURCE 1, SOURCE 2
This post brought to you by Diageo. All opinions are 100% mine.

Zacapa

Every Rum has it's own special story. For example, you drank THIS rum and the next thing you know you found yourself running away from a bull in the streets of Spain, naked with your body tattooed from head to toe with a huge, pink swastika....

OR...

You drank THAT Rum and ended up fleeing a dairy farm under gunfire in an attempt to liberate a bunch of chickens that you felt were forced to lay eggs under very poor working conditions...

BUT...

Are those stories really worth telling? Are those stories that stand the test of time? There are so many different types of Rum out there, most of which consist of 3 parts sugar byproducts, 4 parts bad decisions making and 3 parts terrible hangovers. Cheap, classless Rums that stake their claim to fame but creating fake stories and trying to build legends from the insipid imaginations of marketing executives. One Rum doesn't need to do any of that. It's class speaks for itself.

Only one rum has a unique story of it's own to tell. A story rich in culture and tradition. Only one rum's magical taste embodies the class and history of rich a peoples. Here is the tale of a dark rum with a difference.

In 1976, the quint town of Zacapa celebrated it's centenary and in this atmosphere of  jubilation one of the world's finest rums found its birth place; It was there that Zacapa premium rum was created. The volcanic soils and fertile highlands of Eastern Guatemala provide the perfect conditions for harvesting pure sugar cane. Unlike most rums, which use molasses (a by-product of the sugar making process) as their base, Zacapa uses only the concentrated first press of sugar cane, known as "virgin sugar cane honey" and that's what gives this Rum it's magical taste. 

Then Zacapa is aged in the exquisitely beautiful Quetzaltenango highlands, 2,300 meters above sea level, where the cool mountain air slows the aging process, creating a unique complexity of flavor. The "House above the clouds" where Zacapa is aged, is one of the world's finest, using a unique Sistema Solera perfected by the Spanish 500 years. The Rum is passed through several casks that previously housed American whiskey, Oloroso sherry and Pedro Ximenez wines. Each of these large vessels imparts its own inimitable character that helps give Zacapa it's distinctive taste. You can all but taste it's pedigree and class as you take each sultry sip. 

That's a story that will impress the most savvy of Rum connoisseurs or even the most ignorant of laymen just trying their hardest to look classy. Join the experience and pick up a bottle of Zacapa premium dark rum today. Be a part of this special story.
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Bill O'Reilly Anders Behring Breivik
Last Friday Anders Behring Breivik, 32 carried out his murderous spree in Norway, killing 93 people and injuring over 100. Motived by anti-immigrant sentiment, Breivik is unapologetic for his actions and in subsequent interviews has described himself as Christian. This caused a raucous response from Bill O'Reilly where he lashed out at the "liberal media," labeling Norway Killer Breivik as a 'Christian Extremist.' He then went on to demand that the media prove that he is "Christian."


The Headline:

"As Horrors Emerge, Norway Charges Christian Extremist."

Anders Behring Breivik Norway Gunman and Bomber
Anders Behring Breivik, the Christian extremist.
This kind of hypocrisy is terrible since O'Reilly has never had a problem referring to Muslims in similar terms. O'Reilly spent a great deal of time and effort clarifying that Breivik.

A) Was NOT Christian in the true sense.
B) Did not exhibit behavior consistent with that of a Christian.
C) Disagreed fundamentally with various aspects of Christianity.

Had the headline read:

"As Horrors Emerge, Norway Charges Muslim Extremist..........."

O'Reilly's response would have been different. I know this because he has never with more conviction and fact finding resources tried to disprove the connection to true Islam of any terrorist groups or people that have affiliated themselves with Islam. Consequently, people that watch his show have over the years come to associate "Muslims" or "Islam" with terrorism believing that elements of the religious practice encourage or endorse such actions. So let's be fair. There is no liberal, left wing conspiracy to malign Christianity or any other conspiracy of that nature. This guy calls himself a Christian. Clearly he has bastardized the ideology of the religion, the definition of a  CHRISTIAN EXTREMIST!
Diamond Breaking

Well this person's name is "Voltron?" so is it not reasonable to assume that they might have some interstellar technology capable of shattering the hardest known material on earth? Let's be open minded and reasonable here! Let's carefully consider all possible options.
Yes, now imagine her changing diapers...
A 9 (A Sex Pot)
A 9 is extremely attractive but it is possible to imagine meeting a person as good looking as they are in a really upscale, expensive night spot. You may also have one as a friend on facebook but ended up never having anything to say to them. While social acceptance for them will be pretty easy, they will encounter many problems as a result of their good looks. A 9's personality will be largely ignored and therefore they are likely to be very bland, uninteresting people. 9s are less likely to have a crappy personality because they will take exception to the behavior of  perfect 10's and try to differentiate themselves from them.

People will not be able to look past this person's sex appeal. When you look at them the "have sex lever" in the brain is put in over drive. Women will slip into a mad frenzy similar to that of the Beiberholics and men are so overwhelmed by their physical appearance that it supersedes everything else. For a man, encountering a 9 his main priority will be get this person in the sack so that they can boast about it to their friends at happy hour rather than seek something meaningful.

One will never consider a 9 as someone they can take home to meet their parents because they are simply too attractive. Their appearance will evoke the wrong types of emotions in parental figures who will often perceive them as lose or slutty instead as opposed to sexy. The main reason why 9s are not parent-friendly is that parents will not be able to picture someone so beautiful managing a household, much less dealing with baby poop and the other unsavory activities that come with raising a child.

A 9's best chance at a long lasting, meaningful relationship would be to find someone that is able to look past their looks. This may require something extreme like dating blind person. Marriage is a sure thing but people are still too focused on your looks and that will plague you till the day they begin to fade at around age 35 (white people) and age 45(everyone else). A 9 will begin to enjoy life a little more once people can look beyond their looks.

Example of this: 
The super hot girl that has an entourage of less attractive women. She is usually cynical towards men and complains that all men want is to get in her pants. Most guys are too afraid to ask her out. The only only ones that do are overbearing, overconfident assholes.

Exception: Ugly Ducklings!
People that used to be unattractive but suddenly developed into gorgeous people. Ugly ducklings that turn into 9's will be awkward around the opposite sex because they will not be used to dealing with so much attention from the opposite sex. It will not be uncommon for them to be surrounded by several people that desire them but that they misdiagnose as platonic friends.

Chance of Marriage: 90%
9's make excellent trophy spouses. They can also can double up as the super hot person who is married to what everybody agrees is a person below their level.

Chance of divorce: 70%
Once the novelty of their appearance fades they will be exposed as slightly bland.

Examples:
Jessica Biel, Jessica Alba, Vivica A Fox, Katie Holmes, Shemare Moore
Cute Labrador retriever puppies
It's good to be a pooch in the US!


People, animals, health care, dogs in the USA
Really?????
Then again this doesn't really surprise me at all. Most of these animals have better health insurance than me lol!
michele Bachmann and Sarah Palin Dumb Quotes
Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann contributing to noise pollution.
Michele Bachmann:


Specialty: General ignorance, presented confidently and with no apparent sign of shame. Speaks faster than she can think and often confuses herself.

Top 3 Dumbest Quotes:

3. Carbon dioxide is portrayed as harmful. But there isn't even one study that can be produced that shows that carbon dioxide is a harmful gas. On CO2..

2. I find it interesting that it was back in the 1970s that the swine flu broke out under another, then under another Democrat president, Jimmy Carter. I'm not blaming this on President Obama, I just think it's an interesting coincidence. Blaming Obama for the swine flu epidemic.

1. A woman (Terri Schiavo) was healthy. there was Brain damage, there was no question. But from a health point of view she was not terminally ill. On Terri Schiavo.

MORE MICHELE BACHMANN QUOTES

ALSO READ: HEY POLITICIANS, BE SMARTER:

SARAH PALIN


Specialty: Lack of political knowledge but proficiency in inventing cheesy catch phrases and words. Doesn't know anything but manages to convince other people that don't know anything that she does.

Top 3 Dumbest Quotes:

3. But obviously, we've got to stand with our North Korean allies. On how she would handle the current hostilities between the two Koreas.

2. They are also building schools for the Afghan children so that there is hope and opportunity in our neighboring country of Afghanistan. Speaking at a fundraiser in San Francisco, Oct. 5, 2008

1. If God had not intended for us to eat animals, how come He made them out of meat?
.Profound musings from Sarah Palin's book "Going Rogue".

MORE SARAH PALIN QUOTES

BONUS: Christine O'Donnell.


Specialty: Bible misinterpretation and a political and moral agenda 2000 to 3000 outdated. Also practiced witchcraft.

Top 3 Dumbest Quotes:

3. What's next orgy rooms? Menage a trois rooms? Coedness is a radical Agenda forced on college students. On coed dorms.

2. American scientific companies are cross-breeding humans and animals and coming up with mice with fully functioning human brains. On genetics!

1. It is not enough to be abstinent with other people, you also have to be be abstinent alone. The Bible says that lust in your heart is committing adultery, so you can't masturbate without lust. Masturbation = Adultery.

MORE CHRISTINE O'DONELL QUOTES.

Who is more of an embarrassment to women in politics?..........

Uggs vs Crocs Ugly shoes
Uggs are currently trending on twitter despite temperatures soaring in the high 90's in most of the country, proving that people still subscribe to the idea that  $$$ + comfort + Sh@tty appearance = Style. Meanwhile, Crocs are still on the rampage and are the golden standard for the "comfort meets ridiculous look" side of the spectrum but which monstrosity is worse? Which hideous shoe pushes the limits of ugly and tacky to new astronomical heights. Lets break it down!

UGGS......
< href="http://www.ugglike.com/images/455.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;">Skirts and Uggs: Uggs vs Crocs Ugly shoes

  • Preferred by white women who also own Apple products and frequent frozen yogurt establishments and organic supermarkets. 
  • Wearers are also magnetically drawn to Starbucks and gigantic sunglasses.
  • Originally worn as soon when temperatures dip below 60°F but are now worn with skirts and shorts in temperatures as high as 105°F.
  • Could previously have been the shoe of choice for mammoth-hunting cavemen in prehistoric times.
  • Negative opinion on Uggs based on ugly appearance, tacky look, exorbitant price and use in appropriate weather conditions.
CROCS......
Crocs and Socks: Uggs vs Crocs Ugly shoes

  • Shoe of choice for babies, nurses, gardeners, stoners, delinquents and men and women aged 45-90.
  • Inherently includes double clothing crime “Crocs with Socks”and because of this can be worn all year round.
  • Considered "Cheap and comfortable" rather than "Expensive and Comfortable" also considered ugly.
  • Commonly spotted near baby carriages, at beaches, on red carpets and at corner grocery stores.
  • May originally have been invented clowns to wear with their pajamas before bed, offering a clown like appearance while providing comfort. 
  • Negative opinion on Crocs based on ridiculous appearance, childish look and assortment of colors that never match with any clothing.


So which shoes are more despicable? Uggs or Crocs? I hope you can decide, because I pretty much can’t.

Contribution by Kennith Griffin.
My daughter has gotten really, really into those Twilight movies. I don’t really understand what she gets out of them and I even read two of the books to try and relate but I’ve just never been a big fan of all that science fiction kind of stuff anyway.

My husband and I got http://Expertsatellite.com satellite so he could watch the games and it turns out some of the premium movie channels air the Twilight movies from time to time so my daughter’s constantly checking to see when they’re on! She really likes that Robert Pattinson kid but I think he kind of looks like he needs to take a shower, to be honest with you. I guess it’s a pretty harmless thing for her to get into and I know the characters are all really good and chaste so I guess if she likes it she can keep watching it as long as it doesn’t interfere with her school work or her socializing with other kids her age.
The web is full of articles about women talking about all their dealbreakers (here is one of many examples). The Dealbreakers range from reasonable ones like, "he must not be involved in terrorist activities" to downright ridiculous ones that are very easy to remedy like "must be able to match his clothes" or "must not take too long to get dressed," things I place in the category of problems you can easily rectify using Google. Here are some dealbreakers for men.


1. She doesn't have her own life.
If the girl doesn't have her own life, the guy will have to compensate for it by having to play too many different roles in her life. He will have to be her boyfriend, her BFF, her casual aquintance, her support, her entertainment etc, some of which he will be ill-equipped to execute. Nobody is that multi faceted or that interesting, that's why we tend to socialize with a diverse range of people that bring different things to the table.A female friend will be better at listening to a slew of problems or complaints without feeling the need to provide a quick solution. She will provide an attentive, empathetic ear because certain topics and issues that women have men simply don't care much for.

2. Just a pretty face!
Eliminating the variables of hygiene and staying physically fit etc, we have very little to do with how we look. Unless you appeared as an apparition to your mother before you were born and personally supervised the procreation process, you are just the product of a random blend of two sets of genes. So if you do absolutley nothing else with yourself, like play sports, perform the arts or at least have an interesting hobby, it really disturbs me. That means as a member of society you have done absolutely nothing interesting to better yourself. You are lazy and putting all your eggs in a basket that will wither away with time. When the novelty of your looks wear out, what do you have to offer then?

3. Bad habits.
Bad habits are repeated patterns of self-destructive behavior. If you ended up throwing up on the side walk one day because you drank too much that's one thing, but if you are doing it every time you go out then it is problem. I can put this one simply. If you can complete the following sentence "Every time you see her she is...................." and people add some kind of self destructive phrase then it is a sign that you have developed a bad habit and a sign that some changes need to be made.

eg.
"Every time you see her..........she is always getting into fights" 
"Every time you see her..........she is bring down the mood and destroying a good time" 
"Every time you see her..........drunk and hell and causing a scene"

4. Lack of confidence.
Many people lack confidence in certain areas but if it is inherent to all aspects of your life, it can become tiresome and repetitive to the people around you. Girls that lack confidence are always looking for approval and validation and so it will end up that most of the conversations you have will end up being about them. They will always be talking about if they are prettier than other women, if they did the right thing or in worst case scenarios the lack of confidence manifests itself in unhealthy jealously or other negative emotional responses. No one wants to spend the whole day telling you how pretty they think you are and have it counteracted by you telling them how ugly you think you are. Love yourself first and you'll be better able to love others.

6. Has too many "dealbreakers"
Having standards for yourself is a good thing, in fact a quality person will have high standards for themselves. Flexibility and compromise are also very important. If you are someone who spends all their time making elaborate, detailed lists of things you want or don't want in other people, you are probably spending too little improving yourself. Instead of considering the idea that your insecurity and lack of trust may be driving men crazy, you might re-frame the recurring problem as a deal breaker e.g (I don't want a man that always talking to other women in public). Consequently, such a person ends up with a long list of deal breakers but at the bottom of the list in the footnotes there will always be the question, "Why am I alone?"
 
7. Won't back me up.
My family was a team. In public we backed each other up, but it was very possible that although you have back up you'd still be slapped upside the head for acting a fool in public. It's good to know you have support from someone else. When your girlfriend gets in a fight or causes a public kerfuffle the guy is expected to defend her, or step in and end things discretely if indeed she was at fault. I expect the same from a women. Whatever, if I am being a total idiot we will discuss it when we get home and you are more than welcome to throw a sleeping bag out the window and lock me out for the night for a night, but in public we are supposed to be a unit. 
 
8. Too much make up.
There is nothing wrong with wearing make up to highlight your natural attributes but all things must be in moderation. If you caked on an extra face worth of make up it tells me about your attitude towards yourself. The attitude that your social acceptance and value is a function of how you look tells me you are willing to spend an eternity smacking on enough make up making you eligible to work as a clown at  cirque du soleil just because you think it will impress someone.. What will you do in the morning? Wake up at 5am, put on makeup and get back into bed so your boyfriend doesn't see your real face? ~ I've heard it happens ~ yikes.

9. Not telling the truth. 
If someone doesn't tell the truth you can't trust what they have to say. That just means even little things they do become unnecessarily stressful because you could be off doing just about anything else other than what you said you'd be doing, the possibilities are endless.  Lies are a poor foundation to build anything on because the sledge hammer of truth is constantly banging away at their very foundation. Plus being truthful is a matter of respect. I get that humans have to lie in certain circumstances, that is the nature of being an adult but it must be understood that lying to people you care about is a good way to kill solid relationships.
1. Women's sports can be every bit as exciting as men's!
The France verses England quarter final game was a thriller. England scored first and France tied it up at the death. England went down to 10 women and battled their way though to extra time only to lose dramatically in a penalty shootout. I thought it wouldn't get any better than that until I saw USA's never say die attitude help them perform a miracle verses Brazil with Abby Wambach's 122nd minute which set up a penalty shoot out that the USA eventually won. Meanwhile, unnoticed, Japan were knocking out tournament favorites as if it were 10 pin bowling. All the action in the tournament was epitomized by a thrilling final. A final in which the USA looked to be bossing the game but ended up being administered a taste of their own medicine. Japan fought back to win a thrilling penalty shoot out where Carli Lloyd sent a penalty kick so high into the air that the ball is still in orbit.

If you were one of those people that believe the women's game to slow, boring and void of true skill then amid your musings you ended up missed the most exciting soccer tournament we have seen in while.



2. ESPN screws up again!
ESPN put together a commentary team of pro-USA announcers whose agenda was to focus on team USA even in games where they were not present. ESPN is big network not a local television channel. They should be more professional when hosting events on a world stage. The commentators were biased, misleading and failed to be the valuable source of non-biased analysis that people need. The ex-USA players were merely studio cheerleaders that backed any calls that were in favor of the USA and opposed any against them, creating unnecessary controversy instead of focusing on the more sublime elements of the game and advancing the sport as a whole. I am just happy there was no Alexi Lalas so I can't say it was all bad!


3. Everybody has a crush on Hope Solo!
Hope Solo...everybody's crush.
Everyone has a crush on Hope Solo, even women. Her allure is probably tied into to how much of a jerk she was after the last World Cup. After being left out of a semi final game verses Brazil in which the USA were thrashed 4-0, Solo famously went on TV  and let the world know that her replacement Diana Scurry, the coach and the coach's momma all suck. Solo is the key to USA getting anywhere because as you can see a good keeper makes all the difference. France and Sweden are an example of that as they both had ticking time bombs in goal that exploded in Semi Finals sending both teams packing. Even the media is obsessed with shot stopper, who like the drama queen that she is, always claimed to have some little pre-game injury which ironically never seemed to manifest itself on field play, in fact quite the opposite.Either way, there is just something about Hope Solo that gets everyone going.

4. The traditional women's soccer powers will have to make changes to continue to dominate.
The skill and creativity of Brazil's Christiane and Marta, something the old guard lacks.
Traditional women's soccer powers did not win the World Cup. More importantly, they looked dated and unsophisticated. None of them had the guile, sophistication or technical ability of France, Brazil or Japan. The likes of USA and Germany have long survived on having fitter, faster, bigger women playing the sport. Now that traditional soccer playing countries are playing the game and bringing with them more flair and skill. The USA needs to produce a smarter more technically adept players that will be able to open up defenses with a bit of guile. Players like Louisa Necib of France or Mata of Brazil. Fitness, speed and power are easy things for nations to catch up with and you will see opponents toughening up physically in years to come, the same can not be said of skill or technical ability.

5. The best team won!
MVP Homare Sawa and Japan win Women's World Cup 2011
Japan, Champions of the 2011 Women's World Cup.
If you have been watching the tournament you'd have noticed the superb, Tiki-Takka-like, possession style Japan have been playing and how theey hav managed to control most of their games with patience and excellent teamwork. Led by MVP Homare Sawa (5 goals from 6 games), Japan played the best football and made the least errors in key times. Japan were a pleasure to watch and deserved a little bit of fortune to beat the USA in final because that was one of the couple of games that they weren't able to dictate the pace of play. USA did not deserve to win. They haven't played well all tournament, the sheer will power of the team got them this far. USA fought valiantly and fought  and I admire that about them

"Hot woman magnifying glass"
A weekly round up containing some of the more ridiculous search queries that YOU entered in search engines to get to articles on this site........Being the helpful bunch we are, we have attempted to address the search engine queries where our web pages could not.

CLICK ON THE SEARCH QUERIES/TERMS TO FIND OUT WHAT ARTICLES THEY LED TO!!


1. "Using race card to get dates"
Great of you to mention this. I always use the race card to get dates. It is a smart way to guilt people into dating you. I do it all the time. I tell white girls that they'd never date a black dude because of their attitude to black people that subliminally developed over the years as a result of slavery. When they deny it, I ask them to prove me wrong over a cup of coffee. Basically, after you mention the word "slavery" they become overcome with guilt to the point where they will do anything. I also use this method to get white people to clean my house, wash my car and do my laundry. It works!

2. "Part of Africa with white people"
I can speak with great expertise on this matter since I lived in Africa for a long time. I can in fact confirm that there are plenty of white people in Africa. They tend to inhabit either dirt poor, war torn areas where they build hospital and schools or in the wealthier areas, in gated communities where they can avoid black people i.e crime and AIDS. The best places to find them would be more stable countries like Botswana, South Africa and Namibia or in obscure countries like Central African Republic or Djibouti but anywhere where there is a civil war is a good bet. Either way I can confirm they are there and flourishing!

3. "Marrying a flirty girl"
If she is flirting with you that can be fun, kinky and sexy. If she is flirting with everyone else but you, you might consider signing a prenuptial agreement. If you are already married and she is still flirting that is unacceptable. Times have changed and sadly we can't tie women up and forcibly stop them from going outside so one must be a little bit more sophisticated. Buy her an ankle monitor bracelet, similar to those they place on sex offenders and make up a romantic reason for getting it. Modify the bracelet so that it administers a small shock every time she gets within 2 feet of another man. In about 3 months remove the bracelet and your problem should be solved by way of the "Pavlov's Dog" effect.

4. "If a guy calls out a girls name from inside a car is he into you?"
That all depends on the situation. If you don't actually know the guy, it's very possible that you may end up the subject of a murder investigation. If you do know him, he could be into you but he has chosen a really weird way to express his feelings for you. It's far more sensible for him to get out of the vehicle and have a more meaningful conversation with you. Also, where were you standing? If you were on the road there is a good chance he is trying to warn you that you are about to get hit by a car or run over by truck. So again, the nature of the situation is key.

5. "Can lesbians have long fingernails"
I am sure lesbians can have fingernails of varying lengths, depending on their individual tastes. The feminine ones tend to have shorter nails to facilitate their more gentle nature. The butch, male-like lesbians may keep choose to keep longer nails to enable to ward off men by furiously scratching and hissing at them. In any case, don't be surprised to find lesbians with long nails. They exist!

6. "Seductive women that men give presents" (Unknown Article?)
Stuff-about.com is a family friendly, SFW website and we don't provide escort services or message parlors with benefit etc. There are plenty of other websites that can assist you in this endeavor. They can make available to you all the women you can possible imagine that will be seductive and provide you with any "presents" you may desire.

7. "premature ejaculation "powered by blogger" (Article unknown and didn't bother to try to find it)
Just to clarify, you want to be bad in bed? I have no idea how to advise you on that........wink wink. Hear that ladies?


Megan Fox back when she was attractive enough to get away with anything. With her looks ever fading, we now hear of reports of how much of a pain in the a@s she is to work with.
Beauty is commonly evaluated on a scale from 1 to 10. The Diagram below shows the normal distribution of looks from the very divine to the very hideous. This is a multiple part series defining each level.

A 10: Divine.
This is a surreal kind of beauty, the person looks naturally photo shopped. An actual 10 doesn't exist, nobody is perfect. They are only 8.5's and 9's that are subjectively eligible to be bumped up depending on many factors. A 10 likely to have a very shallow, superficial personality and will very likely be an asshole. Why? Because they can! 10s can be mean-spirited and self-centered and still get exactly what they want because they are idolized and always given attention from people.

A 10 will also very likely have a false perception of how the life works. They will believe that life is easy and turn a blind eye to the hoards off less attractive people around them as the world kids dust into their faces. 10's will reap the benefits of great social acceptance and will be able to achieve more so long as they can maintain their beauty.

The problem is physical attributes fade. When this happens, suddenly the world will not as friendly as it once was. Where they were once attractive, tolerable assholes, they will now just simply be a regulation assholes sans the privilege of behaving badly and getting away with it. They will spend the rest of their lives trying to recover the glory of the good old days, eventually realizing that they have to be nicer and treat people better if they intend on achieving anything. A has-been 10 may resort resorts to radical measures to reclaim their good looks like multiple cosmetic surgeries but usually once you've lost the spark it's gone.

Example of this: The formerly hot chick from High School.

The super hot girl from high school that used to treat everyone like crap back in the day. Now she is a has-been. Plump,attractive, unwanted and unloved. Ironically, she is more likable this way but people always chuckle tell tall of how the used to be so hot.

Exception: Ugly Ducklings!
People that used to be unattractive but suddenly developed into gorgeous people. Since they once had to work for social acceptance, they will be part of the rare breed of super attractive people that are actually nice. They are likely to be corrupted once they realize their new found super power.

Chance of Marriage: 98% 
98% while they are still in prime condition.

Chance of divorce: 105%

Inevitably, once their looks fade they will not have much of a personality to fall back on.

Examples: Megan Fox, Kim Kardashian et al!


COMING SOON: A 9 (Sex Pot)
Casey Anthony of PA, telling people out there how he can live with himself after what he did!
Make no mistake, it sucks to be Casey Anthony, who some people claim intends to have plastic surgery and change her identity once she is released from jail. It sucks to be the Casey Anthony accused and acquitted for the murder of her 2 year old daughter Caylee but apparently it also sucks to be anyone at all named "Casey Anthony." 

This is what Casey Anthony, a 43 years old African American resident of Pennsylvania, who is a few years older and several shades blacker, has found out. After the verdict, Casey has been the recipient of over hundreds of friend requests and messages on Facebook with misplaced sentiment intended for for his now notorious namesake. He has also received numerous phone calls with misplaced rage answering "How he can live with himself" or "how he can be so heartless as to take the life of an innocent child." Questions he is ill-qualified to answer seeing as though he has absolutely nothing to do with it. I suppose this is what happens when people are:

A) Stupid and don't pay attention to details.
C) Color blind or blind in general.
D) Fake and haven't know about or cared about this trial until somebody told them they have to.

Even if it is as a result of a genuine accident, why are people bothering to waste their time sending hate mail to the woman. Don't people have lives and kids to raise?

Just in case you forgot, she looks like this ~ so leave the black dude alone!
Seriously.  A name is just a reference. Not everybody named "Adolf" intends to exterminate the Jews and not every Latino dude name "Jesus" is "Jesus Christ our Lord and savior." I find this type of behavior to be very bizarre.
Mark Halperin Calls President Obama A Dick
Mark Halperin apologizes but there is no sense in apologizing when you said something because you thought people weren't listening.
I have no idea how I missed this but apparently morning Time reporter Mark Halperin decided that it would be prudent to call the President of the United States a "Dick" on national TV. I won't even bother explaining. Just see it for yourself.....
Transcript

Mark Halperin: Are we on the seven second delay?

Mika Brzezinski: Lordy.

Halperin: I wanted to characterize how the president behaved.
Scarborough: We have it. We can use it. Go for it. Let’s see what happens.

Brzezinski: We’re behind you, you fall down and we catch you.

Halperin: I thought he was a dick yesterday.

Scarborough: Delay that. delay that. what are you doing? i can’t believe — I was joking. Don’t do that. Did we delay that?

Halperin: I said it. I hope it worked.

Scarborough: My mom is watching! We’ll know whether it worked or not.

A message to the presenters: Be careful of what you ask for. You can't take a nap with rattle snake and than act surprised when it bites you in the face. I think as a host you control the show and you can't egg someone on and then distance yourself from the consequences. In any case, you simply can't call the President a dick, at least not on TV. It's just a matter of respect for office.


Gonorreah is taking its place among the elite group serious sex-related f'ups you can make along side HIV, Herpes and Babies. Scientists have found the first "superbug" strain of gonorrhea in Japan. This announcement is just three days after the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) warned that U.S. gonorrhea samples had being showing new signs of drug resistance as well.

The H041 strain is resistant to the class of antibiotics, called cephalosporins, commonly used to treat the STD. Cephalosporins are the only class of Antibiotics the CDC currently recommends for effective treatment of Gonorrhea. This development can potentially make the most commonly transmitted infection into a global public health threat because of the ubiquitous nature of the bacteria.

This announcement comes as no surprise to medical authorities as Gonorrhea has been becoming increasingly resistant to antibiotics for several years now, and the percentage of cephalosporin-resistant gonorrhea cases in the U.S. is on the rise, according to the CDC's latest Morbidity and Mortality Weekly Report.

Gonorrhea Superbug: First Antibiotic-Resistant STD Strain Discovered
Gonorrhea bacteria under the Microscope

Sources: Healthandtime.com, Hpost
How about the same rehashed, trite article you might find at yourtango.com written by someone who has on several occasions personally been freaked out by one or more of these things. It's all well and good having a woman telling other women how to avoid scaring men off but I think a man's perspective is golden. So here are 9 things I know for sure scare the sh@t out of most men.

1)Talking about having or naming babies.
If it wasn't for that stupid blog, we'd all have names by now!
Unless you are pregnant or are currently in possession of an unnamed baby there should be no reason to be playing "if we had a baby what would we name it..." games. Secondly, the concept of a baby is scary to a man because it means they are essentially tied to you forever. There is a little half and half of the two of you that you are responsible for and can't legally can't kick out or disown till it's at least 16. If the a guy has not thought about the possibility of being with you forever, which develops over time, then anything baby related is scary.

2)Talking about Marriage and the future too often.
Slow down, we just met!
It's not that men don't want to get married and have a fruitful future but it's generally not at forefront of of their thinking until much later on in their lives. Some women have been thinking about it since they were in diapers and have their marriage pre-planned out to the very last detail. When they see a guy, they are thinking of how good of a long term partner he can be and how he looks in this fake future life they have spend tireless years designing. Men are usually thinking of establishing whether or not the women is a psycho or not in the short term. Besides, how one have such a precise plan for something that hasn't happened yet?

3) "Ladies Night."
When the specific words "LADIES NIGHT" are mentioned it has an ominous ring to it. In a man's mind, it means there is an issue in your relationship and the case is being submitted to a jury of her peers. Any of her friends that don't like you will now have the chance it plant an incendiary device with your name on it in her head. Ladies Nights can be especially ominous if a girl doesn't do them often, then after some kind of recent conflict or slump she suddenly goes on one. Ladies Nights can often be the precursor to impending doom so avoiding the specific phrase "Ladies Night" is a good idea. Otherwise there is nothing wrong ladies with chilling with their lady friend. In fact it should be encouraged. They are willing to discuss so many things I really don't care to talk about.

4) The phrase "We need to talk"
We need to talk, meet me in interrogation room 6
Rarely is this phrase used and resulted in a casual conversation with no long term implications. Maybe is has but in a man's mind it's going to result in a sit down to discuss something he is doing wrong. "We need to talk" is often also accompanied by a morbid passage of time where they guy has to roll back in time to figure out what it could possibly be about. It's better to accompany the phrase with a brief excerpt on what it's actually about to reduce the anxiety level. Try "We need to talk about what happened last Saturday" or "When you have time can we chat about you running naked in the mall."


5) Saying "I love you" prematurely or all the time.
You shouldn't be in love with anybody after two weeks and you definitely shouldn't be in love with someone after 2 hours. If you think you are, feel free to keep it to yourself. To a guy, really strong feelings early on are signs that you might be the insane, overly passionate type. The type that might drug him and tie the both of you to train tracks in front of a speeding train just so that the two of you can be together forever. A guy is also afraid you will say, "I love you" around his boys because he is obligated to answer. The outcome will be a thunderstorm of ridicule from his boys once the girl leaves. Girls might say, if he loves you he shouldn't care but why make him go through such a thing? A guy also shouldn't have to tell you he loves you 10000 times a day in 47 different languages. It will become mindless repetition and a form of torture I'd wish upon no man. If he say he loves you once in a while and acts like it all the time that should be enough. 

6) Excessive phone calls or texting. 
Maybe if I call him again he'll respond. 1000 is a round number!
It can be frightening to look at your phone and see 230 missed calls and 4500 texts which you received while during your 10 minute shower. It suggests that the girl is either, insecure or has an unhealthy obsession with you. Obsessions are scary because obsessed people are capable of anything. Romeo and Juliet is based on two young people obsessed with each other and look how that turned out. If you call and someone doesn't not pick up, feel free to try once or twice more in case they didn't hear the ringer, then leave 1 voice message or send 1 text message like a normal person. They will call you back as soon as they can. Don't make a person pick up a call just to stop your continuously barrage of calls. They will invariably not be happy to speak to you.

7) Profound, hormonally induced mood swings.
It's a simple matter of men failing to understand the mechanisms or reasons behind such things. Men can cope with a slow but consistent assent into a different mood. In fact, they can have the chance to stop whatever it is that they are doing before it gets to the point of no return. Mood swings are abrupt and insurmountable, more like being on a flat road and smacking straight into a mountain that appeared instantaneous with no warning. To go from happy and cheerful to livid and homicidal in space of five minutes is very scary. Those are the kinds of situations that result in her punching you in the throat, hitting you over the head with frying pan or "accidentally" lighting you on fire.

8) Having to talk about Ex's.
Get over him! And I mean, "GET over him" not "RUN over him"
There is no reason to be overbearing when it comes to discussing your ex. No guy wants to spend too much time talking about other men. When discussing ex's a comparison is being made but one of the people being compared is expected to give their input. They are expected to express an opinion about a complete stranger with the only source being someone who is really biased, usually negatively towards the very same stranger. Discuss your ex's as much as you want with your BFF, after all that's what she is there for. Compare us as much as you want just don't involve me.

9) A woman with no female friends.
It scares a man when there is an unrealistic burden placed on him. If a man has to be everything to a woman i.e her boyfriend, her girlfriend, her husband, her best friend, her activity partner, her confidant and her entertainment, he is destined to fail because no one person is that interesting or capable of being everything someone else needs. The reason we have many different friends in life is because everyone has something different and uniquely interesting to offer mankind. It is also the case that every man wants to be considered as an independent entity and not some appendage growing out of his significant other. Sad when a man stop being referred to as "he" and mutates into the collective reference "they."


In case you missed it, this is stunning footage of the space shuttle Atlantis (www.nasa.gov) embarking on the STS-135 mission, the last of the famous shuttle program.

Space Shuttle Atlantis mission NASA Space program final STS-135 mission Pic
Space Shuttle Atlantis blasts off into space bring an end to the famous NASA Shuttle Program.
Penis Size link to Ratio of Index and Ring fingers
A shorter index finger may better an indicator of larger Penis size.
Determining penis length as a correlation to hand a foot size has been widely debunked but a team of Korean researchers has produced what may be a more reliable guide. It involves measuring the ratio of the length of a man's index finger to that of his ring finger.

"Dr. Tae Beom Kim, a urologist at Gachon University in Incheon, Korea, and his colleagues studied 144 men over the age of 20 who were undergoing urological surgery for conditions that do not affect the length of the penis. One member of the team carefully measured the lengths of the index and ring fingers on the subject's right hand before surgery -- left hands are thought to be more variable. A second team member then measured penis length immediately after the subject had been anesthetized. The length was measured both when the penis was flaccid and when it had been stretched as much as possible. Stretched length is thought to correlate to erect length....."

The study found that:

In general, the lower the ratio of the lengths of the two fingers, the longer the stretched length of the penis, therefore the larger the penis. 

Personally, I am just a little concerned that one can set out innocently to the doctors office for treatment and end up having their genitalia stretched to the maximum. I don't think I want anything on my person "stretched as much as possible" no matter the level of anesthesia.  Hopefully the parties gave consent to this "tug job" and didn't just wake up from their surgery to find a creepy doctor and his colleagues standing over them with measurement instruments whispering amongst themselves. Anyway that's all from me. I am off to pull my index finger out of it socket a bit more ;-).

(Source)

Give yourself a chance to make discoveries and open up the door to many possibilities Walden University's online degree programs will allow you to do just that. Visit WaldenU.edu to learn about Walden.
I was just making sure the people that installed the toilet didn't rip us off!
24. "They told me at the blood bank this might happen."


23. "This is just a 15 minute power-nap like they raved about in the last time management course you sent me to."


22. "Whew! Guess I left the top off the liquid paper"


21. "I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm!"


20. "You didn't knock first! Usually that wakes me up!"


19. "I was testing the keyboard for drool resistance"


18. "I was cross-training for telecommuting."


17. "In observance of my religion I have to take a nap everyday at this time facing East?"


16. "Darn! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem."


15. "The coffee machine is broken...."


14. "I was hypnotized by my screen saver."

13. "Boy, that cold medicine I took last night just won't wear off!"


12. "Ah, the unique and unpredictable circadian rhythms of the
workaholic!"


11."Know thy enemy. I had to know exactly how it feels to sleep at work so that in future I can prevent it?"


10. "I just needed a quick reboot. All the computers in here do that?"


9. "I squashed a fly by accident, I was just checking to see if it's still breathing."


8. "I hear tremors, quick let's get everybody of here!"


7. "OMG it's morning already and I'm still here?"


6. "Don't interfere with this. It's a matter of national security."


5."Recent developments in computer monitor design allow me to project information directly onto my eyelids."


4. " Janice was right. These tables can definitely support more weight than the previous ones. Good call buying them!"


3. "Come here, listen closely, is it just me or is the keyboard making funny click sounds?"


2. "Sorry, I was preparing for my interview with, Air Traffic control (FAA)."

AND THE #1 BEST THING TO SAY IF YOU GET CAUGHT SLEEPING AT YOUR DESK.....


1. Raise your head slowly and say, "I Jesus name we pray...AMEN"


CLICK HERE FOR 24-50
Everybody needs em!
An exhaustive compilation of all all the excuses you could ever possibly need if you get caught sleeping at work. Some of these you may know but there are a few surprises here and there. ENJOY!

50. "You think I was sleeping? Hmmmmmmm you seem to know an awful lot about sleeping at work, why is that?"


49. "It worked well for Reagan, didn't it?"


48. "Shhhh....I am in the middle of a video conference right now"


47. "This is one of the seven habits of highly effective people!"


46. "I think way better when I sleep."


45.  "I'm in the management training program."


44. "For security reasons I am going to have to ask you not to tell anyone what you have seen here today. Lives are at sake!"


43."Statistics prove that people who take a short naps after lunch get more accomplished than people who don't."


42. "In my culture this is how we get things done!"


41. "Do you discriminate against people who practice Yoga?"


40. "I thought you (boss) were gone for the day."


39. "The mailman flipped out and took out a gun so I was playing dead to avoid getting shot."


38. "I'm actually doing a "Stress Level Elimination Exercise Plan" (SLEEP).


37. "I'm increasing everyone else's productivity by reducing my oxygen consumption."


36. "I was up all night tracking down hackers that were trying to break into our system. Luckily I was able to hold them off!"


35. "I was testing the cubicle's sleeping conditions. They are excellent, you need to look into it. This is a work place not a hotel!"


34. "Me, snoring? No, that was the floppy drive!"


33. "Someone must've put decaf in the wrong pot."


32. "I was just testing my eyelids for holes. So far I haven't found any, but I must keep looking!"


31. I was cross-training for telecommuting.


30. "I wasn't sleeping. I was trying to pick up my contact lens without hands."


29. "This is in exchange for the six hours last night when I dreamed about work!"


28. "I was working smarter, not harder."


27. "Ha! Fooled you, didn't I?"


26. "It's okay... I'm still billing the client."


25. "Sleep deprivation currently costs businesses nearly $150 billion annually, I am actually saving the company a lot a money."

CLICK HERE FOR 24-01